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Sunday, January 10, 2010

The Winter of my Discontent

Fractured, frozen puddles in the yard
remind me of a past
filled with discarded ice skates and
parkas with sleeves as thick as marshmallows.

The pond is congealed with ice and
the top provides the illusion of solidity
I stand outside with red cheeks and a red nose
wishing I'd found my mostly unnecessary mittens.

I shove my hands in my pockets out of necessity,
and I take stock of this icy blast in my life.

Are these plummeting temperatures a wake-up call
or rather, a recollected past that I willingly walked away from?

Are these hibernating, crystallized blades of grass an allegory of
my present, my future?

How long will I stand still, on the edge of something great and
continue to choose to be frozen, rather than growing?

How long will I be held down against my will - fighting unseen
forces not in my control?

Winter is a necessary evil - a time to stand still and
face cold realities -
a time to acknowledge fear and to learn to put it aside,
a time to drive roots deeper and to make convictions stronger.

Even though I cannot see spring, my faith tells me that it's there.

As the ground crunches beneath each step, I hear
the trickling of water and smell the dew of new beginnings.

The icy reality laying in front of me helps me to develop
the courage to believe once again.
The trees sway in their barren acknowledgement of my dreams -
and I stand - solitary and isolated - but not alone.

Waiting and trusting in unseen daffodil blooms.

Joshua 1:1-9  2 Timothy 1:7

mks 1.10.10